A few notes on method.
Because there have been several important changes in the Septathalon over the past years, an exact comparison is impossible. The most noticable differences:
1) Event/Scoring change. In 1999, supplemental events (Frisbee Golf and the Dam Diner Dash) were worth 300 points, while in 2000 their value was raised to 350. Additionally, the Pen Twirling event (worth 75-100 points) was dropped from the 2000 Septathalon. In 2001, Paintball/Bond was dropped altogether, and Frisbee Golf was promoted from a supplementary to a major event. Malcom and Lawrence's Wacky Island Invasion Adventure Mission was ignored by the vast majority of the participants, but it still provided a small boost to those who were brave enough to take part. Finally, the Dancing Game was added in 2001 as the second supplementary event.
Consequently, the total scores should not be taken at face value. They must be considered in relation to the scores of the other competitiors in the same year.
2) Competition change. If all the same people had competed both years, a comparison would have been much more straightforward. However, new faces such as the Flash and General Swift in 2000 had a major impact (on the running events especially). Also, not everyone completed all the events each year, further disturbing the individual and overall results.
3) Schedule change. While the 1999 Septathalon took place over 3 days, events since then have taken only 28 hours. This certainly led to fatigue, especially in the later events. Also, some events were scheduled for different times of day, which had an impact on performance. In 2001, MALWIAAM was certainly detrimental to the performance of some.
4) General conditional change. Since the events each took place a year apart, weather conditions were slightly different. While the exact impact of this is hard to quantify, it certainly was a variable to consider.
Taking these factors into account, it is still possible to examine the performances of each competitor. Ten people completed most or all of the events in two or more of the years: The Animal, Paul, Animalito, vinnardo, Matt, Scott Dogg, Jacob, John, Johann, and Angry Bear.
This year's results are especially challenging to forsee, since the presences of Animalito, John, Johann, and Angry have not yet been confirmed. Additionally, there will reportedly be a larger number of competitors than ever before, increasing the odds that a newcomer will take one of the top spots and throw the totals off.
| The Animal | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 1999 | 1st | 1st | 1st | 1st | 7th | 4th | LAST | 2nd | 1st | 1st: 5400 |
| 2000 | 3rd | 2nd | 2nd | 1st | 5th | 4th | LAST | 2nd | 3rd | 1st: 5150 |
| 2001 | 2nd | 2nd | 2nd | 1st | 7th | 5th | N/A | 4th | 2nd | 1st: 5375 |
| 2002 | 2nd | 2nd | 2nd | 5th | 1st | 5th | N/A | 3rd | 2nd | 1st: 5575 |
| 2003 | 2nd | 2nd | 2nd | 2nd | 2nd | 9th | N/A | 4th | 22nd | 1st: 4975 |
| 2004 Prediction | 2nd | 2nd | 2nd | 1st | 7th | 5th | N/A | 4th | 1st | 1st: 5425 |
From the start, the Animal has been the one to beat at the Septathalon. The secret to his success seems to be versatility. Even when his performance is not as good as expected in one event, he is able to make up the points somewhere else.
Despite a stunning defeat in Ultimate and less-than-average performances in Ping Pong and Bowling, the Animal still pulled off a narrow victory in 2003. Was it really a close shave, or just grandstanding to make things look more interesting? Perhaps 2004 will provide more answers.
| Animalito | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 1999 | 4th | 3rd | 5th | 3rd | 3rd | 5th | 5th | 5th | 5th | 3rd: 4600 |
| 2000 | 4th | 6th | 4th | 6th | 9th | 2nd | 7th | 4th | 2nd | 3rd: 4200 |
| 2001 | 7th | 4th | 4th | 4th | 5th | 6th | N/A | 1st | 3rd | 3rd: 4500 |
| 2002 | 4th | 4th | 6th | 2nd | 3rd | 4th | N/A | 6th | 1st | 2nd: 4925 |
| 2003 | 5th | 4th | 4th | 4th | 8th | 4th | N/A | 5th | 10th | 6th: 4000 |
| 2004 Predictions | 5th | 4th | 4th | 4th | 5th | 4th | N/A | 5th | 2nd | 3rd: 4725 |
The Animalito has been another force to watch out for in recent Septathalons. While he doesn't dominate in any one event like some other top competitors, he consistently earns enough points to make a strong showing. Amazingly, he placed 6th or better (thus earning more than the minimum 300 points) in 86% of the events (37 of 43) he competed in over the last 5 years, placing 5th or better in EVERY event in 1999 and 2002.
The wider field of competition hurt the Animalito in some of the 2000 events, especially frisbee golf, the adventure race, and miniature golf. Still, in 2001 he put in stellar performances in all these events, and improved even further in 2002.
Lito continued to turn out a number of strong performances in 2003, but due to slip-ups in Mini Golf and Ultimate his overall score was less than expected. Still, he remains a potent threat for 2004.
| Paul | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 1999 | 2nd | 2nd | 2nd | 2nd | 2nd | 6th | 6th | 5th | 3rd | 2nd: 5050 |
| 2000 | 8th | 4th | 3rd | 3rd | 12th | 6th | 6th | 7th | 7th | 7th: 3550 |
| 2001 | 3rd | 5th | 15th | 2nd | 11th | 2nd | N/A | 7th | 12th | 6th - 3600 |
| 2002 | 3rd | 3rd | 3rd | 6th | 16th | 1st | N/A | 9th | 5th | 4th: 4300 |
| 2003 | 4th | 3rd | 5th | 1st | 20th | 2nd | N/A | 8th | 3rd | 2nd: 4675 |
| 2004 Predictions | 3rd | 3rd | 3rd | 3rd | 7th | 2nd | N/A | 6th | 3rd | 2nd: 4925 |
One of the most shocking developments of the 2000 Septathalon was the performance by Paul. A mysterious combination of factors led to a 1500 point drop in total score and a 7th place overall finish, also spawning an FBI investigation into point shaving allegations. Partially thanks to the findings of this report, it was concluded that there was insufficent evidence to support formal charges.
Indeed, Paul's scores were fairly consistent in many events. While he dropped one place in frisbee golf, the difference in his scores over the two years was smaller than most other competitors'. Changes in his Adventure Race and barefoot mile times were also comprable to the rest of the field, and he performed equally well in Ping Pong and paintball/Bond. While he lost ground in bowling, this was certainly due to the greater number of competitors (his score actually increased by 4 pins). While Paul did lose a lot of points in the Dam Diner Dash, miniature golf, and Ultimate Frisbee, there is no reason to believe that it was a conscious decision.
In 2002, Paul made a spectacular comeback, increasing his score considerably despite heightened competition in all the events. The rise to prominence continued in 2003 with a win in Frisbee Golf and a third place finish in Ultimate, leading to a very close second place overall. Is Paul due for a victory in 2004, or will his performance drop off again?
| Matty | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 1999 | 6th | 5th | 9th | 4th | 1st | 2nd | 9th | 1st | 10th | 4th: 4500 |
| 2000 | N/A | N/A | 7th | N/A | 1st | 3rd | 2nd | 1st | 6th | 5th: 4000 |
| 2001 | N/A | N/A | N/A | N/A | 1st | N/A | N/A | N/A | N/A | 18th - 900 |
| 2002 | 9th | 12th | 12th | 4th | 2nd | 2nd | N/A | 2nd | 3rd | 3rd: 4825 |
| 2003 | 11th | 10th | 8th | 3rd | 5th | 5th | N/A | 2nd | 4th | 4th: 4225 |
| 2004 Predictions | 7th | 7th | 7th | 5th | 1st | 3rd | N/A | 1st | 5th | 4th: 4500 |
Matt Henschel was another competitor who was expected to make a strong showing in 2000. However, due to schedule conflicts he was forced to miss both supplemental events and one major event as well. Even if he had scored 7th place or lower in all 3 of these events, he would still have been firmly in 2nd place overall.
In the events he was present for, he excelled. He performed as well as he had in the past in Ping Pong, but still slipped a place due to unfortunate seeding. He moved up a couple spots in the mile run, and placed high enough in Ultimate to earn extra points. However, the majority of his strength came from Bowling and miniature golf, which he has totally dominated for the past 2 years. With an excellent performance in Bond added in, Matt managed to make 5th place overall despite his early absences.
Despite surprising defeats in bowling, ping pong, and miniature golf in 2002, Matty still managed to finish 3rd overall. Things continued to go downhill in 2003 due to various factors, but Matty still finished in 4th place and has the potential to improve in 2004.
| vinnardo | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 1999 | 5th | 4th | 7th | N/A | 5th | 7th | 1st | 3rd | 2nd | 5th: 4400 |
| 2000 | 6th | 5th | 8th | 2nd | 11th | 11th | 1st | 4th | 1st | 2nd: 4350 |
| 2001 | 9th | 6th | 9th | 3rd | 14th | 4th | N/A | 3rd | 5th | 4th: 4150 |
| 2002 | 5th | 13th | 10th | 1st | 9th | 9th | N/A | 1st | 4th | 5th: 4200 |
| 2003 | 6th | 15th | 10th | 5th | 3rd | 11th | N/A | 3rd | 2nd | 5th: 4200 |
| 2004 Predictions | 8th | 8th | 8th | 2nd | 10th | 7th | N/A | 2nd | 4th | 6th: 3800 |
Considered a "dark horse" contender by many, vinnardo is still an important part of the Septathalon competition. While his performances in each event have varied slightly, his overall score changed the least of the repeat competitors. Still, it was enough to bring him up to 2nd place in 2000, and he remained in 4th in 2001 despite huge performances from Jacob and the Animal.
vinnardo's main strengths originally came from paintball/Bond, which he won both years it was an event, and Ultimate, in which he placed 1st and 2nd. His rankings slipped in most other events despite improved showings, but due to the fact that he missed Frisbee Golf in 1999 he still managed to come out with a good score and end up near the top.
While Bond was replaced in 2001, vinnardo nearly made up all the difference with his Frisbee Golf score. A similar performance in 2002, combined with "the game of his life" in bowling, led to another strong finish. While 2003 was not as good a year for Frisbee Golf, vinnardo made up for it in Ultimate and a surprising 3rd place in mini golf. We can continue to expect the unexpected in 2004.
| Jacob | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 2000 | 1st | 1st | 1st | 5th | 6th | 15th | 13th | 6th | 7th | 4th: 4100 |
| 2001 | 1st | 1st | 1st | 6th | 2nd | 7th | N/A | 14th | 4th | 2nd - 4600 |
| 2002 | 1st | 1st | 1st | 10th | 10th | 14th | N/A | 12th | 9th | 6th: 3850 |
| 2003 | 1st | 1st | 1st | 12th | 6th | 6th | N/A | 7th | 5th | 3rd: 4400 |
| 2004 Predictions | 1st | 1st | 1st | 7th | 8th | 8th | N/A | 9th | 6th | 5th: 4000 |
A late entry to the Septathalon, Jacob has nonetheless been a strong supporter of the event. After his triumphant return to the U.S. in 2000, he delivered a fine performance with earned him 4th place overall. From the start, Jacob dominated the running events, winning first place in each by a wide margin. He struggled a bit in Ping Pong and Bond, but delivered a solid performace in Frisbee Golf, miniature golf, and Ultimate Frisbee.
In 2001, things only got better. Bond was eliminated, and Jacob's Ping Pong game improved a bit as well. While he slipped in Frisbee Golf and bowling, he gained ground in Ultimate Frisbee and gave Matt Henschel a run for his money in miniature golf.
While things dropped off a bit in 2002 (reportedly due to "exhaustion"), Jacob was still guaranteed to win the running events even with two broken legs. Indeed, in 2003 he delivered a strong overall performance and ended up 3rd overall. 2004 could be the year where Jacob makes his move and finally achieves victory.
| John Ekins | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 2000 | 5th | N/A | N/A | 9th | 2nd | 5th | 5th | 11th | 12th | 9th: 3150 |
| 2001 | 6th | 3rd | 3rd | 5th | 12th | 1st | N/A | 13th | 7th | 5th - 3925 |
| 2002 | N/A | N/A | N/A | N/A | N/A | N/A | N/A | N/A | N/A | N/A |
| 2003 | 3rd | 5th | 3rd | 10th | 7th | 1st | N/A | 11th | 13th | 7th - 3800 |
| 2004 | 4th | 5th | 5th | 10th | 7th | 1st | N/A | 11th | 13th | 7th - 3600 |
Another relative latecomer, John Ekins was not able to participate in the 1999 Septathalon at all, and missed a few events in 2000 as well. However, in 2001 he exploded onto the scene with a stunning 5th place finish. This feat was mostly due to his overwhelming victory in Ping Pong, which he has repeated in every year he's competed since. He was again unavailable in 2002, but came be with another solid performance the next year. If he's available in 2004, we can almost certainly expect another fine showing.
| Johann | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 1999 | 3rd | DNF | 6th | 5th | 6th | 8th | 3rd | 6th | 8th | 4th: 4100 |
| 2001 | 8th | 11th | 7th | 8th | 17th | 3rd | N/A | 5th | 15th | 9th: 2950 |
| 2002 | 7th | 7th | 9th | 8th | 18th | 3rd | N/A | 10th | 17th | 8th: 2975 |
| 2004 Predictions | 7th | 7th | 9th | 8th | 18th | 6rd | N/A | 10th | 17th | 10th: 2650 |
Holding a unique position in Septathalon history, Johann was there in 1999, absent in 2000, and back again in 2001. He has turned in strong showing in several events, especially an excellent Ping Pong tournament in 2001. More notably, he was the victor in the epic struggle for the "naked lady on the leaning tower of Pisa" statue, defeating Andrew and Adam McNally. Johann certainly holds the potential to deliver more surprises if he is present in 2004.
| Angry Bear | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 2000 | 12th | 10th | 9th | 4th | 4th | 10th | 15th | 9th | 4th | 8th: 3175 |
| 2002 | 8th | 8th | 8th | 3rd | 17th | 6th | N/A | 19th | 14th | 7th - 3050 |
| 2003 | 9th | 13th | 7th | 8th | 9th | 14th | N/A | 15th | 7th | 12th - 2600 |
| 2004 | 9th | 13th | 7th | 6th | 9th | 14th | N/A | 15th | 7th | 8th - 2675 |
A long time Officially Approved Person of the MAD FIGS, the Angry Bear (AKA Will) has unfortunately only been to three Septathalons so far. He is definitely a threat in Frisbee Golf, and stands a good chance of placing in Ping Pong as well. Hopefully he will be around again in 2004.
| Scott Dogg | Diner Dash | Adventure Race | Barefoot Mile | Frisbee Golf | Miniature Golf | Ping Pong | Paintball/Bond | Bowling | Ultimate Frisbee | TOTAL |
| 1999 | N/A | N/A | 4th | 6th | 4th | 11th | 2nd | 8th | 7th | 9th: 3125 |
| 2000 | 10th | 7th | 5th | 11th | 3rd | 9th | 4th | 12th | 5th | 6th: 3675 |
| 2001 | 10th | N/A | 8th | 7th | 6th | 10th | N/A | 15th | 8th | 10th: 2550 |
| 2002 | 10th | 10th | 13th | 11th | 6th | 8th | N/A | 17th | 20th | 10th: 2850 |
| 2003 Results | 12th | 9th | 11th | 9th | 1st | 7th | N/A | 20th | LAST | 9th: 3200 |
| 2004 Predictions | 14th | 14th | 14th | 14th | 3rd | 14th | N/A | 14th | N/A | 14th: 2600 |
The most frequently asked question about this year's Septathalon has been: "Why is Scott Dogg
bothering to show up?" Placing 7th or worse in a staggering 77% of the events in previous years,
it seems pointless for him to hope to even come close to any of the other MAD FIGS. His one strong
point has been miniature golf, though past performances have been erratic at best. Additionally,
paintball/Bond has been replaced with Frisbee Golf, another hopeless endeavor.
Oddly enough, Scott Dogg was the only repeat competitor to score higher in overall points and move
up in the standings between 1999 and 2000. This seems mostly due to his inability to finish the
Dam Diner Dash and Adventure Race in 1999, thanks to an exploding spleen. In 2001, his abysmal
performance was only boosted by his participation in MALWIIAM, and things only got worse in 2002 and
2003. There is absolutely no hope for the future whatsoever, and the only reason why Atlantic City
isn't offering 1,000,000:1 odds on Scott Dogg is because such a long number won't fit on the betting
sheets.